Writing is a socially acceptable form of schizophrenia. ~E.L. Doctorow

I am so sick of how easily angered he is....he yells at me even if I have nothing do do with whatever happens to be the issue of the second. Where's the line? Why am I constantly on eggshells?

My fish are in love......Wonder Woman disapproves



I somewhat feel as if these fish are a metaphor for my life....
I had one goldfish, won at a carnival with B. He won Gabriel.

Then a few weeks later, I went to a carnival with J. We won 2 fish. The 2 new fish came into the tank and within a few minutes, the white fish was kissing Gabriel, leaving the other newcomer odd fish out.

Wonder Woman is looking on disapprovingly from outside the tank.

I'm in a bad mood. Is it because I overslept? I never even had time to wash my face.

Main Entry: in·com·pe·tent

1: not legally qualified
2: inadequate to or unsuitable for a particular purpose
3 a: lacking the qualities needed for effective action b: unable to function properly

all of the confidence I had in myself is gone

I am in a very bad mood today, everything is rubbing me the wrong way. I'm really glad this will be a three day weekend.

Celebrate by eliminating Junk mail, write to:

DMA,
Mail Preference Service
PO Box 643
Carmel, NY 10512
Include your full name and address, as well as any variations of your name

He isn't always who he use to be
He isn't always who he promised to be
Today he loves me a little less

Posted via LiveJournal.app.

Remember, Scratch 'n Sniff stickers?

Poet: Samuel Coleridge
Poem: Epigram

Sir, I admit your general rule,
That every poet is a fool,
But you yourself may serve to show it,
That every fool is not a poet.

Silly list of questions, if tagged please answer.
Here are the rules: post this list on your profile (in Notes) replacing my answers with yours. Then tag 25 people to do the same thing.

If I tagged YOU, it's because I want to know more about YOU!

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?

No, but I was jealous that other people were. I told everyone I was named after Uncle Jesse on The Dukes of Hazard (my favorite show at the time). I also told everyone that my full given name was Jesi so that no one could call me Jessica

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
I cry all the time, yesterday, I’m sure

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
No, I’m known for my unreadable writing. I never got the hang of it. When I was a kid I was forced to use my right hand to write, and I never really got good at it. EVERYTHING else I do, I do left handed.

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
I’m a Vegetarian, but I do like Tofu sandwiches with hummus, my favorites were made at Nutricureen, I L O V E falafel, either from the Greek Gourmet at the Fairgrounds Farmer’s market or that place on South Street

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?
Baxter Beagle & Calypso Kitten.

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
I hope so

7. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
yes

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?
Yes

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
I would love to, anyone wanna go????
Where? When?

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?
Depends on the day……lately I’ve been eating Special K, but it’s very boring

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
no

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?
Um, just one? Chocolate or wait, Chocolate Chip, or Chocolate-chocolate Chip, or sometimes Mint Chocolate Chip, or, or, or

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
Eyes and Smile

15. RED OR PINK?
Red

16. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?
That I gained weight when I quit smoking (Years & years ago) and I can’t freakin’ loose it

17. WHOM DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
old friends I lost touch with

18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO COMPLETE THIS LIST?
Either way, it doesn’t really matter

19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?
Navy Blue pants and matching Navy Blue Chucks ;-)

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
Radio

22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?
Purple

23. FAVORITE SMELLS?
Fresh flowers, Bergmont, Spring, Ginger, Cinnamon, Coffee Brewing, Lilacs, Lavender

24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
Shane

25. HOW DO YOU KNOW THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU?
Friend, she works with Bob

26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH?
Anything live, on TV whatever.

27. HAIR COLOR?
Brown

28. EYE COLOR?
Blue

29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
Some times

30. FAVORITE FOODS?
Falafel, cheese calzones, the spinach pasta that Bob makes, mac & cheese

31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?
Both, but I see more comedies, anyone out there wanna go with me to see My bloody valentine in 3D?

32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
The Dark Knight in Imax, last Saturday

33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
Brown

34. SUMMER OR WINTER?
I love the seasons, all! Autumn is my favorite

35. HUGS OR KISSES?
Hugs

37. DESCRIBE YOUR PENCIL CUP.
At work it’s the lid to a 100 spindle of Cd’s

38. FAVORITE ARTIST(s)?
What kind of artist?
Dali, Andy Warhol, Picasso, DiVinci, Degas, Van Gogh, Francis Bacon, Munch
Alfred Eisenstaedt, Annie Leibovitz, Dorothea Lange, Art Wolfe, Margaret Bourke-White
Chip Kidd, Dave McKean, George Grie

39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?
Look me in the eye : my life with Asperger's-John Elder Robison
Me of little faith-Lewis Black
Rant: an oral biography of Buster Casey-by Chuck Palahniuk
Life Is a Verb- Patti Digh

40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
Home, a photo from Mel’s wedding with at buch of Lifetouch friends.
Work a wrist support mouse pad for my MAC and a Purple pad that I draw on for my PC

41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT?
Didn’t watch TV

42. FAVORITE SOUND(S).
Music umn, I have to give this more thought…..*

43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?
The Beatles

44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
Hawaii

45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?
of course ; )

46. WHERE WERE U BORN?
Pottsville, PA

47. FAVORITE PIECE OF JEWELRY?
nose ring

48. HOW DID YOU MEET YOUR SPOUSE/SIGNIFICANT OTHER?
I was in Art School with Annie, she worked with Bob. She wanted to take a photo of Bob, but was afraid (yes afraid) to go alone.

Ok, now I’m ready:
*42. FAVORITE SOUND(S).
Birds chirping, some one reading out loud, click of a shutter, wooden or copper wind chimes, rain

1. I equate being loved with being taken care of.
2. Before Bob, I don’t think I was ever really taken care of. (Not even when I was little)
3. I tend to take advantage of Bob, to see how much he will take care of me, to test the limits.
4. I like to be read to.
5. I am more intelligent than people give me credit for.
6. Spell check has changed my life
7. I am a technological junkie, especially when it comes to MAC products.
8. I worked hard to get rid of my coal cracker accent, but apparently I still have problems with t’s in the middle of words. Button, Elton, Important, straighten etc.
9. I believe going to catholic school (K-5th grades) ruined Catholicism for me
10. I sucked my thumb until I was 12. I still remember the first night I was able to break the habit…October, 1985, Michelle Gehris’ B-day party. I was new to Mifflin, and invited to my first sleepover with new friends. I was able to break the habit out of shame. Never went back. BTW, Kim & I wore similar PJ’s to that party. Mine were red & white stripes, hers Blue & White.
11. I generally feel lonely even when I’m not alone
12. I usually have a camera with me wherever I go
13. I love flowers, but HATE plastic ones.
14. I think all life is precious including animals.
15. I carry bugs outside instead of squishing them
16. All my emotions are on the surface. I cry very easily now. When I was young I never cried. I guess this is progress.
17. When I REALLY laugh my eyes water like crazy.
18. I have oddly shaped toes; my 3 middle toes are longer than my big toe.
19. I am extremely restless, I always want to go somewhere new, or try something different
20. I love words, some of my favorites are: Amulet, Serendipity, Wanderlust, Onomatopoeia, Alliteration, Xanadu, Zephyr, A Billet-Doux (love letter in French), Nemesis, Stardust, Chupacabra, Love, Peace, Hope, Dream
21. I don’t have a middle name
22. I know this poem by heart:
Hope By: Emily Dickinson

Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune--without the words,
And never stops at all,

And sweetest in the gale is heard;
And sore must be the storm
That could abash the little bird
That kept so many warm.

I've heard it in the chillest land,
And on the strangest sea;
Yet, never, in extremity,
It asked a crumb of me.

23. I recently learned that I fractured my neck when I as a teenager. There is still a hairline break.
24. My grandfather was a door to door milkman. When I moved to Shillington (1985) I was surprised that you had to go to a store and buy milk.
25. (I’m stealing this one from D.S., but it rings true for me too) I never told anyone I loved them and didn’t mean it. I still love everyone I ever said “I love you to” I believe Love is the answer-always.

25 Random Things About Me (I've been trying to post this on Facebook, having problems, so I thought I would post it here, if you are my Facebook friend also, this will be appearing there too)
1. I have had several head injuries one resulting in partial amnesia
2. I lived in an apartment with 2 roommates while I was still in High School; I celebrate the day I moved out of my Mother’s house every year.
3. Photography was not my first career choice
4. I went to Night School while working full time plus during the day to get my degree, I was valedictorian of my class.
5. I use to have full blown night terrors, now the dreams are downgraded to nightmares and insomnia; I believe these are because I still have a hard time feeling safe.
6. I use to be left-handed; I went to Catholic School and was switched when I was little. Apparently, being left handed is evil
7. Most of my more recent friends don’t know any of the above about me (until now)
8. I am a horrid speller.
9. I have won several National Photography awards and I have been published countless times.
10. I wear my glasses most of the time because I’m too lazy to put my contacts in.
11. I have very specific groups of friends in my life that directly correlates with what was happening in my life at the time: Pre Mifflin Friends, Gov. Mifflin Friends, Apartment days, Art School, Creepy Tom, Lifetouch, BHB.
12. I’ve become very nostalgic lately
13. I miss a lot of my friends from the past
14. I married my husband twice. Once 10.31.97 in a Bed & Breakfast by a judge, then again on 3.17.01 in a Church by a priest. The second time was to appease my Mother in law.
15. I donate my hair every two years to Locks of Love
16. I allow anyone to stay at my house if they need a place to stay
17. I always try to give people money when they ask.
18. I find it very rewarding to teach Yoga to children with Autism
19. I volunteer to paint faces at Library fundraisers
20. The last few items are some of the things that make me a Liberal
21. I draw elaborate scenes on my driveway in sidewalk chalk. Usually the scenery entails a visual synopsis of a novel.
22. When I can’t draw on the driveway, I tend to draw on our walls.
23. I am the Yoga Instructor for Penn State Berks: “Yoga And Meditation Society” (Y.A.M.S.) I tend to forget that I am almost twice the age of the students, I still feel like I’m 19 years old.
24. A few years ago I quit my job of almost 10 years, with no other job prospects insight. I decided to get my Yoga Instructor Credentials. To pay the bills while I was taking classes, I got my CDL and drove a school bus of teenagers to Prison School. The kids were awaiting trial (as adults) and were not allowed to go to their regular school. I lasted MUCH longer than any other Bus driver they had in the past. I was the first girl to do the job-ever. I believe these children never had anyone tell them they could be something, be someone, that they HAD choices to make. I believe I made a difference in their lives. I left when most of my original students had their trials. After that I started working for hats.com
25. Number 24 was one of the best decisions I have ever made in my entire life.

This sounds like fun, so I stole it from disorderly_mind who snagged it from repercussionist.

The first 5 people to respond to this post will get something made by me. Could be jewelry, knitting, a card, baked good, anything. I'll decide based on who responds. However, this offer does have some rules:

- You will receive your goody within the next three months.
- I'm not going to tell you what it is, so you'll have to be surprised.
- You have to post something similar in your journal before I start to work on your goody.

Want to be my friend there? check me up:

http://photogrrrlstar.insanejournal.com/

So, how are you? You were in my dream last night. It was actually a nightmare, and completely realistic and possible. Sometimes I think dreams with Monsters are easier to deal with. Easier to dismiss. Anyway you were in my dream last night, so now I have a compulsion to hear from you.

New Years Resolution for 2008

Take at least one Photo a day- Done! YAY! now I just need to make a slide show.

Stop at Wawa less - Didn't do so great

Drink less English Toffee Coffee - I drank less, but not much less, this will def. be a carry over item. Maybe I'll keep track, so I will be more accountable.

Go to the Gym!- I tarted out great, but then slagged off. My excuse? I started teaching yoga a lot! I'm up to 8 classes a week. Here's how I fared up.
50.5 gym hours, sadly 14%

Do More Yoga - Done and Done! I did great with this. I really increased the amount of hours I teach and do yoga!
284 yoga hours!!! 77.8%

Loose weight
Save Money or spend more wisely
Sleep More
Cleaner House
Continue on my self portrait a day journey
Do less of what I do not want to do and more of what I want to do
Resume Gratitude Journal

I never knew how much I loved Beagles until I got Baxter. He was a rescue. When I saw him, I fell in love. Beagle's get my vote. Bax is the happiest puppy ever. He loves everyone.

I am alone in my house for the first time in a long time.

I dyed a blond streak in my hair
I put my pajamas on at 7:30 PM
I painted my toenails
I made paper cranes
I watched two episodes of Heroes